Goodbye 2007

And hello 2008.... very soon.

There's lots I'm glad to see the back of in 2007, but so much more I'm happy to have been through. Time for a reflective? Goodness no! Far too much fun in store still!

Happy New Year to you all. For those of you who have suffered, may the forthcoming year bring you happiness. For those of you who have had a great year, may 2008 be even better!

Published at last!

"The ghost sniffer took its time..."

Back in March I did the recording for my first ever properly published work, "The Ghost Sniffer and other stories" - a collection of short ghost stories. The publisher is a small independent with fingers in many other pies, but the books arrived at last!

So now I have to market them - set up my website properly, add a shopping cart, send out promo copies and really push it. It's the start, I hope, of me getting writing properly.

Want to buy a copy?!!

Coming to America!

"By the time I get to Phoenix..."

The last few years my old man has bought me some pretty fantastic Christmas presents: flying a Tiger Moth, Gliding and - last year - wind tunnel flying. This year he has completely blown me away: I am going to America!

On 8th January I will be flying from Heathrow to Chicago and then on to Phoenix. Now, why (you may ask) am I going there? Because my very good friend, Nadine, lives in Glendale. We've been friends for over a year (via our writing circle. Nadine, Cathy and I are all moderators on the forum and have become firm friends over the last year. I have managed to meet up with Cathy in Ireland a couple of times (see 'A trip to Ireland' and 'oop North') but the thought of managing to meet Nadine, well ... it wasn't on the cards.

So - my husband has been liaising with Nadine over the internet and arranged that I am going to visit for a week. He has also arranged time off at work with my boss and obviously has all the bases covered for my planned absence. He also bought me the National Geographic traveler guide to Arizona... and I am SOOOOO excited!

Grand Canyon, Indian reservations, cities, desert.... so much to see and .. and.. I have no idea what we will fit in over just one week, but maybe even cross the border to California.

Now, almost everyone seemed to know about this present (my neighbours, my friends, my colleagues and, of course, my family) and Nadine (yeah, and Cathy) of course. When I opened my present and saw the tickets and book - I have to say I was speechless.

Now all I have to do is be PATIENT!.... (fat chance) and plan what to pack, what to wear, what to ... aargh! I'm going to America! I've never been outside Europe before, this is going to be soooooo cool.

What can I say? Well, I could mention what I bought Bryan for Xmas, but it's going to pale into insignificance, isn't it?

A shirt.
A board game.
A coffee maker
and
A black, bat shaped electric bouzouki.

He's drunk so much coffee he must be jizzed out his skin, and he hasn't stopped playing his new instrument. He's going to wear his shirt today and I'm sure we'll play the board game soon.

Just remains for me to say Merry Christmas to one and all. And yeah, you bet I'm going to have some new stories for my blog over the next few weeks!

Take five minutes...

The other day I went down town to take some books to the charity store. I had meant to do a car boot one day... but ... cold mornings and too much effort.

So I parked, bought a ticket (50p for one hour) and unloaded the boxes of books into the shop and they were appreciative.

As this only took me 10 minutes, I had a good few pence worth left on my parking ticket so I wandered round town briefly. No particular aim in mind, I went up our small market town high street and looked in a few shop windows. We have one shop, a tailor, owned by Colin Creevey. I do wonder if JK Rowling ever visited our little town.

I looked in the window of the jewellers, and then turned round to face the street. I just stood. Doing nothing, thinking nothing almost. No urge to move.

Then I heard my name called, and I turned and saw a friend I had not seen for nearly four years.

If I had left town, or gone into a shop, or done anything other than stood stock still for those few moments outside the jewellers, I'd have missed her.

We walked together to the bakers, then back to her car (in a hurry, off to a fancy dress works party in Stratford Upon Avon). We spent 12 or so minutes together very companionably.

The following week I went shopping in Milton Keynes. I followed signs to the 'Park and Ride', parked the car then crossed the road and got on the bus. Only one other passenger, a tall man with a big coat (it was mighty cold) and a violin case on the seat next to him.

The bus pulled off and he turned to me and said 'Good idea this, isn't it?'. Park and ride. I agreed. We then entered into a brief conversation but in that time we discovered we were both singers. He played violin for fun, but sang in a choir.

When he told me he was a 'lay clerk' at a cathedral, it kind of fit. He had - if such a thing is possible - 'that look' about him.

It was a lovely five minute ride to the shopping centre, talking with him, and when I left the bus I had a big grin on my face. There are nice people in the world, and sometimes we are lucky enough to meet them and share a few moments with them.

I met one man for five mintues, I met an old friend for 12; those were precious moments. Each one brought a smile to my life.

Learning about EFT

Turning on the 'tap'

My weekend started on Friday evening, with the works Xmas 'do' - a great meal in a lovely hotel, plenty of drink (not too much, I was sensible) and the unusual sight of Zoe dancing on crutches. Saturday was spent quietly, doing some shopping, house stuff, things like that. Sunday, however, I went to London.

Planned for some time, this was a day I was spending completely selfishly. I went to meet Alison Munro and learn about EFT and how to do it (see Extremely Freaky..). It's taken me a few months to coordinate my diary and actually have a free day to go on her programme, so I was really pleased that she could fit me in. As it happened, it was the smallest class she'd ever taken - only two of us.

Normally classes were about 10 people, so Debbie (the other delgate) and I had some real quality one to one teaching. Alison told us about the history of EFT (in its current form it has only been around for 14 years) and how successful it is. We saw videos of wonderfully emotional Americans loving every minute... yeah, I was midly sceptical, except... except I've seen it work.

Alison showed us how to do it, the series of tapping your finger on meridian points around the hand and head, the language you use for 'set up' statements to get the messages right, and how you need to listen and adapt what you say and look for the emotional source of the issue you are tackling. It's odd, I have to say, but it does work.

Alison tapped on each of us, we tapped on each other (but we didn't tap on Alison). It can be used to help with all sorts of things from emotional pain to pyhsical pain, from habit breaking to confidence building. The best way to describe it, she said, was 'Like acupuncture, without the needles'. Folks can relate to that better than the weird meridian point and energy stuff.

Anyway, it was a good day. I enjoyed the programme immensely, found it very beneficial and it gives me a little extra weapon in my armoury for tackling self-confidence issues, nail biting (three weeks now and I've still not bitten them, since my original EFT encounter back in November) and anything else that comes along to challenge me.

Crutch? Supersition? Placebo? Does it matter? If it works - and for me it does - then rock on, I'm on side!

Standing for Tom

Last night we went to Alex's school to celebrate their achievements - lots of students came to receive their GCSE and AS and A Level certificates.

Many of them had come back from their first term at university, many from their first term of college (most of whom seemed to be at the school's own 6th form).

As well as receiving their certificates, there were also special awards for each subject in each year.

Alex had to be dragged - almost literally - to the event. "Nothing special" was his attitude. He was reluctant to shed jeans and wear trousers and a reasonably smart shirt. But we are glad we went - because he won an award for Media studies.

He got a little whoop of encouragement from classmates when he went up to collect his, a nice sign of the cameraderie in his group of friends. Many of those we saw collecting awards we knew, some since primary all those years ago.

The Head did a reasonable job of hosting; though no game show host, he did passably well. The guest speaker, a professor who is transferring all of Newton's works onto the web (some 8 million words?!), gave a slightly too long but interesting talk too.

The moment that got me though - above even watching my son receive his award - was when the kids 'stood for Tom'.

Nearly three weeks ago a young man called Tom, just 19, was killed on the rail crossing in our town. I didn't know him, but I knew people who did, and all were unanimous is their sadness at the loss of this young man.

At the celebration evening, Tom's parents attended to collect his A level certificates. What courage it took them to stand there in front of hundreds of people, every one knowing their loss. The applause was amazing - but the kids, his friends, showed us all what to do. They stood for Tom. The teachers followed, and then everyone else in the room.

Other parents that I knew were in front of us, and at one point turned to us and said 'So what's Alex going as to the party, then?' Party? What party? 'Oh,' she said. 'There's a party on Friday and the invitation says 'Fancy dress, and this means you too Alex'!

He has declared he is going as an elf. But it's a good thing she mentioned it - he had forgotten and we hand't a clue it was on. And elf! That'll be the day.

Maybe I can!

I take class for the first time

Hey! Not many at training today, so I got to take 'warm up' and take everyone through basics. Haven't done it before... even though I'm brown belt in shotokan karate, this was the first time I'd been asked to do the session start.

So - there's 3 beginners, 4 middle and a couple of seniors plus Sensei. After warm up (which I only missed one bit out, but I improvised) I took them through basics: punching, kicks, blocks... stuff I've done for years! Oh yeah, I got it wrong! It's like the first time on stage - you know every word of the song but as soon as the microphone goes live, you dry up.

But I did OK, with a bit of prompting from Sensei, of course. Then we split the class up and I took three through some kumite (partner fighting but to a strict routine) and then kata (series of moves in a specific pattern). They did ok. One young girl (I suppose she is about 12) got quite confused, but I think in the end she managed it OK. It's remembering hand, foot, body, fist, shouder positions... all those things at once. One cheeky lad told me we were doing the kata wrong, but what had happened is he'd mixed two up. He was convinced he was right! Er, sorry mate, listen to the higher grade - for once she is right!

After a while I was transferred to the beginners. Boy, did they need help! They managed to confuse me to start, but I really enjoyed watching the slow but definite progress they made.

At the end of the class Sensei thanked me, said he liked how I teach, thinks I have a 'nice way'. Good. It was so nice to have some positive feedback on something, and something I particularly enjoy.

I like our karate class - the mix of ages and abilities works well. The previous Sunday where we just do kata, I watched 15 year old Nadeem help 50-ish year old Alan train. The respect given by young to old and old to young is based around ability, and it's fantastic to watch.

I like karate. Just don't catch me on a bad day, OK?

Love

Oh gawd - what is she on about now?

Well, you see - I'm British. Therefore Love is a four letter word. From childhood, love was not something discussed. Certainly no hugging! Well, maybe, but I just can't remember that clearly to be honest. As a wheezy, scabby, unhealthy wraith of a child, I guess hugging me might not have been that attractive a proposition.

So, Love. But let's start with hugging: my friend Penni used to say hugging me was like 'hugging a concrete pillar'. Fun, eh? I did not know how to respond to tactile people. Never mind I have two kids, a long and happy marriage - other people touching me? Goodness! What a thought.

Now, husbands and kids notwithstanding, there's a lot of people who I know and love, but would never have dreamed of telling them - using the four letter word! It just isn't done, you know. Or ... well, that's what I thought.

But I use it with my kids - I tell them I love them, they use it with us as parents, with their friends and with granny. It's good - it's nice. I've even used it in passing conversation with one or two of my friends, daring eh?

And, I've started to hug people too - have for about the last year, and - you know what? I like it! I like human contact, being told without words that I matter, that I am acceptable, that touching me is not something to be avoided.

And, I've learned to accept and use the 'love' concept a little more broadly too. Tree hugging? No, not yet (though I believe the Silver Birch is especially grateful for such interactions), but I can now - thanks to two particular friends (you know who you are! Bint and Paddington...) - understand and share love on a different level.

I love my friends! I love them in a very different way to the way I love my husband or my kids or even my mother (well, you've got to love mothers haven't you?). But it is very rewarding.

I can't believe that at nearly half a century, I have not understood or experienced or shared this kind of friendship before.

Love is ok, isn't it? I am allowed, aren't I? Other people can love me too?

In overcoming some of my self-esteem issues, the acceptance of love is quite a big one for me. Yes, my husband loves me - it's his duty after all! Maybe people take what their partner says with a pinch of salt, because it is expected and may assume that it is not objective. It's a settled love, a comfortable love, a living love.

I have found that loving my friends has opened me up to being a more loving person altogether. I need more human touch. I need more because I want to give more.

So, have I gone weird, or am I just a latent human being? I don't know. But I did want to write it down. Because without my friends, I think I'd still be a rather isolated, cold and - as I have been told - slightly intimidating character.

Sod it. I'm just mush now... walk all over me!