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| Therfield Heath, December 2017 |
As you get
older, it’s easy to forget. You start to view Christmas through the prism of
shit-tinted glasses instead of the rose ones you wore as a child. Christmas
becomes about ‘making the kids happy’ or ‘doing the right thing’ and commercialism. Our cynical brains engage with the hype and
see it for what it is and forget the fun, delight and anticipation that it
brought when we were children.
Some are
deeply sad that Christmas seems to have lost its Christian message, but for me
the sadness is about losing the spirit – the feeling that this celebration
allows, cultivates and brazenly promotes. Whether you believe in a religion or
not, it’s hard to ignore Christmas. The television channels fill with movies
where the grumpy cynic is transformed by a magical (or evangelical)
intervention, and songs about love, peace and harmony (and good old rock ‘n
roll) pervade the airways.
I am one of
those whose associations with Christmas have been soured by a past event. From 1973 all my Christmases henceforth were coloured with a brushstroke of experience
that left me feeling distanced, cold and downright Scroogeish. There’s nothing I could ever do to change
what happened, so regret has been my constant reminder every Christmas. This is
partially why I do not like Christmas very much and have, in the past, said that I hate it.
Do I still
see the blatant commercialism as distasteful? Do I still feel the pang of angst
as I revisit that past Christmas and wish that things could change? I do.
But I now enjoy the balance of the season of goodwill because I choose to do so.
No matter
how much money is being prised from the fingers of the susceptible public, no
matter how schmaltzy the movies, there is something wonderful about making one time of
year (for most in the Western world) about being good, kind, and giving.
It’s taken
me a long time to shift from that distrustful cynic to someone who can enjoy
Christmas. I engage with the family and my joy at their delight
never ceases, but for my own heart to be at peace and happy at Christmas it is
still a challenge.
No matter
how commercial the adverts, no matter how predictable or thin the storyline of
a Christmas movie, no matter how much I react against the religious aspect (due
to other incidents in my past and my own atheist inclinations), I have to say
that Christmas does endear many to goodwill. And that, in this world of such
terrible and tragic loss and violence daily, cannot be a bad thing.
I will
enjoy this coming Christmas heartily and honestly; my values brought into sharp
focus as life throws up yet more new challenges and promises. It’s easy to
forget, and sometimes hard to remember, but it should be the living for the
now, for the good of all, for the best reasons you can think of, that can make
Christmas or any day of the year, a day worth celebrating.
Photo credit (C) Carolyn Sheppard
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